The last 2 days have been hard on me. I have been doing so much around the house during the day that by about 7pm, I am pain. My ankles and legs are killing me. I think part of it is I know I am going to the doctor on Tuesday and I'll be getting a prescription for an actual RA medication instead of a steroid to help with the pain. There is an end in sight. Tuesday can not come early enough. This morning was really bad, I had to have Josh help me dry off when I got out of the shower. I don't know why, but it makes me want to cry just thinking about it. I guess it's hard thinking that the simplest task are just torture for me some days. When Katie got here, she had to finish snapping Alex's PJ's because my hands were killing me. I guess I really don't write about the pain very much and I just kinda suck it up and do what needs to get done, but it really wears me down every single day. Last night I fell asleep on the couch around 10. Josh jokingly said something about how I am just exhausted every single night. I really think it is because just walking some days hurts, let alone bending down with the babies, carrying them around and just doing things around here. It just wears my body out. We were putting Alex down last night and I was carrying her to her room, I was basically shuffling my feet because my legs hurt so bad. Josh told me to hand him Alex since I was in pain, and me being so stubborn, I wouldn't. I just held on to her so tight and kept shuffling to her room. I don't know why I insist on being so stubborn, I guess I just feel like I have to be able to do everything for my baby. Josh really does so much when he gets home and I know I wouldn't be able to do it without him, but I guess sometimes I just feel like I have to prove to myself that I can do the small things on my own.For some reason, no matter how much pain I am in, no matter how grumpy I am, Coopie is always there beside me. Just snuggling with him always makes me feel better. This morning, while the girls were napping, I walked into the bedroom and Coop was curled up on the bed. I snuggled up next to him and fell asleep for about 20 minutes. I am not kidding, when I got up, I felt 20 times better. I don't know what it is about him, but he always makes me feel better.
3 comments:
I think that is just part of being a woman. I am stubborn also. I am the same way with Maddie. After I put Syvie to bed it is like Maddie knows. She instantly jumps in my lap or curls up with me. She sleeps with me on the floor at night and I LOVE IT!
J baby, I know how much you hurt, I can see it everytime I'm around you and it kills me to see you in so much pain. I pray fro you everyday and I know you'll get better soon. I'm proud of how brave you are and just remember that Josh is there for you to help you so let him. He feels so helpless and like me, doesn't like to see his baby hurting. Soon baby, soon, you'll feel better. I love you. mom
Dogs are the best medicine sometimes! I am sorry that you are hurting. Cooper understands:). Give him an extra hug!
When I was in a serious car accident about 5 years ago, I could hardly walk. My hips got slammed really hard between the door and the console. I was living by myself and I was trying to get dressed one morning to go to the dr. It was hard enough to get out of bed much less lift a leg to put on some socks and some pants. I dropped my socks after so much effort to get them on my lap. I just started crying uncontrollably. My dog Riley, who up to this point had just been with me for about a year and was nothing more than a cute greeter came running in the room and picked the socks up and brought them to me up on the bed! Every since she has been our sock/undergarment/washcloth retriever! She knew:).
You are in our prayers and can do this!
Amy Hall
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